It's Not What You Think
by DaniMae
Summary: "You're an ass, Poe Dameron," she ground out, accompanying each word with a harsh jab to his chest. He blinked at her, too stunned to do much else, as his mouth gaped open and closed several times before his voice found its way out of his throat. "I'm sure you're right…but what did I do this time?"
1. Chapter 1

Nyra hummed thoughtfully as she worked, the gears in her arm whirring and clicking along as she twisted the wrench in her metal hand. It was an unexpected but pleasant bonus to loosing her dominant arm, no more cramps. She cracked a goofy grin as the bolt fit snugly into place, giving it one last jerk for good measure. The cool air of the open hangar was a welcome relief as she backed out of the engine compartment and balanced precariously, yet comfortably, atop the right wing of a sleek, black X-Wing. A soft sigh escaped her lips as she stretched her arms above her head, back arching deeply into the stretch. Her hand may not cramp any more but her shoulders sure did.

She was rudely pulled from the bliss of her relaxing muscles with a dirty rag to the face. Stretch ruined, she snatched the rag from where it dangled from her forehead and shot a glare to the mess of dark curls peeking out from under the wing.

"Quit lazing about, we've got to get her working by morning," Poe drawled with a cheeky grin, wiping his grime-coated hands on a fresh rag.

She sputtered in response, clutching the front of her green overalls dramatically.

"Poe Dameron, you...you doubt me?" She wailed, her green eyes swelling.

He rolled his eyes, chuckling deeply as he leaned on the workbench to look up at her.

"Now sweetheart, that's just puttin' words in my mouth." He returned her half-hearted glare with a lopsided grin and a wink.

"You know I'll always get her flying for you," she said, pointing her wrench at him.

"I know." He looked at her for a moment, batting his eyelashes. "That's why I need your help." He turned back to the right landing strut with a flashy grin.

"Ah," she sighed, sliding down the wing with surprising grace. "Of course. What can I do for you princess?" She purred, sidling up behind him to peer over his shoulder.

He shot her a playful look before returning to his task.

"This-" he said, jerking the wrench attached to a rusted bolt stubbornly refusing to break free of the crusted mixture of dirt and burnt oil that had congealed around it. "You always have super secret mechanic tricks."

He pouted pitifully at her over his shoulder as she giggled through her hand.

"Aw, poor baby." She patted his cheek with her metal fingers affectionately. "Don't worry, mama's got this."

She traded places with him and leaned forward to inspect the damage.

"Yup, mama's definitely got this." Refusing the wrench he offered her she grinned slyly at him, a familiar 'hold my beer' look they had given each other on many occasion. "I may have discovered I have superpowers."

He let out a snort before dissolving into a fit of laughter.

"I'm serious!" She shouted between giggle fits of her own. "Watch!"

He wiped the corners of his eyes and watched her movements over the gleam of her right shoulder. She clutched the offending object with her fingers, tightening them with a whir. With a grunt, she twisted, stopped, took a deep breath, set her shoulders, and twisted again. The bolt came free and she cried in victory, raising her left fist over her head triumphantly.

"It worked!" She giggled happily. "I'll never get tired of when it actually works." She spun it out of it's socket and turned to offer it to Poe with a brilliant smile that faltered when their eyes met.

He stared at her, eyes wide and lips parted slightly as he took in a sharp breath.

"What?" She asked after a long moment, raising a questioning eyebrow at his complete change in demeanor.

Her voice broke his trance and he snapped his mouth shut, clearing his throat.

"Nothing," he croaked, snatching the bolt from between her fingers. "Thanks."

He turned from her to adjust the knot the arms of his flightsuit made low on his waist.

"I'm, um..." He tossed the bolt onto the workbench with a clatter. "I'm gonna go check on BB-8." And just like that he darted across the hangar to droid repair.

She gawked at his retreating back, blinking in shock at how quickly the atmosphere had changed. He had never talked to her like that, never ran away from her like that.

"Oooookay weirdo," she mumbled, bending over to retrieve the filthy bolt from where it had bounced off the table top and skidded across the floor.

Her eyebrows drew together as she idly traced the spiral pattern along the side with her fingers. That was odd. What could she possibly have done? Four years, four years, of teasing banter between the two of them. Of late nights on the tarmac as she pieced his precious Black-One together and he brought her food and reminded her to eat in between filling her in on the latest mission. They would do it in order of repairs, she would find a new dent or hole and turn to him expectantly for the explanation that followed. He had been the one to pull her from the wreckage that cost her an arm. He had held her as she broke down, exhausted by fits of rage as her new hand refused to obey. He insisted on being her first high-five after completing her first repair after therapy. Her eyes shifted unwillingly to her right hand as she clenched it into a fist before stretching her fingers open.

Suddenly, the repairs didn't seem so important. Suddenly, she remembered she was Chief of Flight Line Maintenance and there were, I mean there had to be, other mechanics that could possibly use her help. Suddenly, she didn't want to be anywhere near Black-One when Black-Leader returned.

Snatching her data pad from the workbench, she sent a message to Ven, her trusted number 2. She set about quickly gathering up her tools, shoving them roughly back into her belt and willing the acid back down her throat. This is impossible. He stood by her through countless surgeries, therapy sessions, and crying fits of both the happy and sad variety.

"You called my lady?" A velveteen voice called lightly as Ven sauntered awkwardly into view, his own green jumpsuit almost hanging off his bean-pole frame.

"Take over," she ground out, not waiting for a response before scrambling away.

She charged down the corridor, determined to be behind her own door before the tears came as she tugged aggressively on the cuff of her right sleeve. A startled yelp left her throat as lithe hands closed around her bicep, tugging her harshly through a doorway before the door slid shut.

"Rey!" She howled, snatching her arm back.

Her friend shushed her, snapping her chocolate eyes to Nyra's wide green ones threateningly before taking her sleeve and rolling it back up above her elbow, sun kissed fingers dancing along her metal forearm.

"What happened?" Rey asked quietly, fussing with the cuff one last time before releasing her.

Nyra snorted.

"I'm probably just over reacting." She mumbled, picking at her nails absently.

The taller woman fixed her with a hard stare. Nyra heaved a sigh and moved deeper into her friend's room to collapse in her desk chair.

"Poe thinks I'm a freak," she mumbled into her hands.

Rey scoffed.

"Poe thinks you hang the stars," she countered incredulously, folding her leg under her neatly as she sank into her bed.

Nyra groaned, fisting her hands in her auburn hair in frustration.

"No, oh for goodness sake you'll hurt yourself." Rey launched herself off her bed and pried Nyra's filthy hands from her hair, preventing her from her habit of beating her fists against her scalp. "What happened?" She demanded, grasping Nyra's wrists firmly in her hands.

With a deep sigh, the mechanic relayed what had happened, stifling a sniffle as she unconsciously tucked her right hand beneath her.

"He just, looked at me," she hiccuped, wistfully remembering how enormously proud she had been of herself the first time she had actually twisted a rusted screw in a fit of rage and gasping as it sprang free under her fingers.

Rey's eyes flashed dangerously as she paced the length of her room.

"You don't know that's what he was thinking. I mean, that doesn't make any sense. He's your best friend." She paused to chew on her thumb.

"What else would it be?" Nyra spat out angrily. "He thinks I'm hideous." Now she was just being dramatic and self indulgent, but she just couldn't stop herself.

"Stop it." Rey demanded a bit more harshly than she intended. "He does not. He's just...an idiot. I'll get to the bottom of it." Her hands landed on her hips for emphasis, head nodding in counter to how frantically Nyra shook her head.

"Rey no, he's my best friend, I should talk to him." She chewed on her bottom lip, stomach twisting just thinking about that conversation.

Rey walked closer, placing her hands on Nyra's shoulders and forcing the older woman to look up at her.

"You're my friend too. You're hurting, and I know you love him, don't look at me like that you know you do, but I can't promise the next time I see his stupid face that my inside thoughts won't become my outside thoughts."

Nyra smiled through the wetness of her cheeks, fondly remembering the conversation she had with her friend after a particularly friendly new recruit had gotten a little loose with his tongue at a certain scavenger. Her face soon fell as she sighed. Rey was right. Four years of friendship, and almost four years of unbearable unrequited love. He was her best friend, and no matter how many times Rey scoffed and snorted when she said it, she was just glad he was in her life.

"I suppose I can learn to live with that." Rey laughed, a light, tinkling sound.

"Like I was giving you a choice." She would see him. Knew exactly where he'd be.

It seemed a certain hot shot pilot needed to be taught some manners. Scavenger style.


	2. Revenge of the Scavenger

The familiar buzz of the busy tarmac flooded Poe's senses as he tore off his flight helmet, sweat-soaked curls clinging to his forehead and neck. He ran a hand through the unruly mess, heaving a sigh as the pins and needles aftershock of adrenaline ran fresh through his limbs. As much as he fought it, his eyes swept the open space for a familiar head of auburn waves, his ears strained to hear a melodic, sometimes sinister, laugh.

Coming up empty, he managed to mumble a muted 'Thanks' to Ven as the lanky man took his helmet from him, undoubtedly to recalibrate the communications systems, and moved towards the hangar. The cheers and enthusiastic waves from Blue Squadron, the victors of today's skirmish, mixed with BB-8's joyful beeps and whistles brought a small smile to his face. One that quickly vanished as the wide-eyed feral face of D'Qar's local scavenger halted him in his tracks.

"You're an ass, Poe Dameron," she ground out, accompanying each word with a harsh jab to his chest.

He blinked at her, too stunned to do much else, as his mouth gaped open and closed several times before his voice found its way out of his throat.

"I'm sure you're right…but what did I do this time?" He couldn't help but feel betrayed as his faithful companion proceeded to roll out of sight with a mournful whistle.

Rey barked out a laugh, arms folding across her chest.

"Really?" She shot a pointed look over to Ven who scurried around Black One, halfway through his post-flight checklist. "Because in all the time I've been here, Nyra's never missed a single take-off or landing."

Shame rolled through him and he dropped his gaze to the ground, shoulders sagging helplessly.

"You need to talk to her." He winced at her hard tone.

"I have no idea what I even did."

Her maniacal laughter filled the hangar, halting at the half incredulous-half fearful look in his eyes.

"Seriously?" She took his silence as her answer. "Yesterday, when you bolted on her-"

"She was the one who left! I walked away for five minutes to check on BB and when I get back she's gone!" He wailed defensively, taking a small step back as her eyes narrowed.

"Because you _ran away_ ," she hissed between her teeth, face flushed. "You made her feel like a monster."

Realization dawned on his face, a fresh wave of shame washing over him as his head dropped to his chest.

"Oh shit."

"Yeah," she growled.

"No, Rey, trust me, it's not what you think," he pleaded, hands raking down his face.

"Oh, yeah? Then what?" She asked, shifting her weight from one hip to the other. Ignoring the warning sirens blasting through his mind, Poe cautiously continued.

"It's…It's probably the exact opposite of what you think." His voice came out just above a whisper, and her eyes softened.

"So, you weren't…"

"What? Disgusted? Repulsed? _Force_ no I could-" his voice cut off, hands tearing desperately through his hair. "I could never. Not her."

She waited for him to continue, gently prompting him as the silence stretched across several seconds.

"Then why did you run?" It was her turn to step back in surprise as his gaze snapped to hers, a wild look contorting his features.

"Because, Rey, I can't… _think_ straight around her sometimes. She's my best friend for Force sake, but sometimes it feels like my heart is gonna beat out of my chest. The one thing that keeps me sane out there, the one thing that brings me back, is when I close my eyes I can see her face. She's smiling up at me like she smiles up at me from the tarmac when I come home. Her face is filthy and her hair's a mess and she's never looked more beautiful." A soft smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, eyes glazing over as that smile flashed behind his eyes. "But the worst part is I don't know when I started feeling this way. I don't know what changed and it drives me crazy."

Rey remained silent through his monologue, quickly hiding the smile that threatened to break across her face before he noticed her defenses falling. She was here for a reason, and if a swift kick to the ass is what it took, so be it.

"Exactly. She's your best friend, and if you don't talk to her you're going to lose her. And yes, that includes when you become so emotionally constipated that bolting sees the best course of action."

He huffed in frustration, back straightening as his eyes darted wildly around them before leaning in closer to her and lowering his voice.

"Well, these flight suits don't hide much," he growled below his breath, pulling away to once again glance around, teeth worrying his bottom lip.

"Oh," she said lamely, eyebrows pulling together in confusion as her eyes traveled down the length of orange material that adorned his currently writhing body. Realization hit her as her eyes reached the loose bunch of fabric below the buckle of his harness, just above the point where his leg straps met.

"OH!" She all but shouted, eyes widening as a faint pink climbed up her neck.

It was nothing compared to the angry red currently painting Poe's tanned skin.

"SHH!" He hissed angrily, eyes bulging.

She lifted her fingers to her lips in a vain attempt to stifle the giggles that bubbled up from her chest, the pathetic look he gave her doing nothing to help.

"Oh," she managed before laughter stole her voice away. "Oh, you poor soul."

She practically heard his eyes roll as she desperately fought to regain control of herself.

"Seriously," she said once her sides stopped hurting. "your little…personal problem aside, you need to talk to her. This…scenario was not the first thing that popped into her mind when you left to…take care of-"

"Okay thank you Rey that's enough of that," he sputtered in a single breath, hands fumbling with the straps of his harness as he looked anywhere but her face. If his face got any hotter he swore he'd burst into flames.

Rey's mouth wobbled slightly with stifled laughter, but her gaze held steady.

"Talk to her," she said sternly, BB-8 whistling in agreement from an unseen location.

Steeling himself with a huff, he locked eyes with her.

"I will. Just, please," his voice dropped, eyes pleading with her. "never mention this conversation again. _Ever_."

She narrowed her eyes at him, stepping closer until her face was inches from his.

"Don't give me a reason to." She stared him down for a long moment before turning on her heel to briskly walk out of the hangar.

An involuntary shiver ran down his spine as, the immediate threat gone for the moment, BB-8 felt safe enough to roll out of his hiding space and slowly make his way towards his master. Poe narrowed his eyes accusingly at him as the droid let out a series of low beeps and whistles.

"Thanks for the back-up, buddy."


	3. Chapter 3

The steam had clouded the small mirror above the sink and nearly engulfed the entire room by the time Nyra stepped out of the fresher. The hot water had felt heavenly against her tired muscles, and she was reluctant to step out of the scorching spray. It had been three days since her awkward moment in the hangar with Poe. Three days since they'd spoken. Three days since she'd slept properly.

She grimaced at the dark bags under her eyes as she wiped the condensation from the reflective surface, repressing a sigh at the splotch of grease she had missed below her ear. Metal fingers twisted around her dripping locks, clicking, and whirring as they tightened to wring out the excess water that trailed across her shoulders and down her back. She moved on muscle memory alone, scrubbing the stubborn spot from the side of her neck with the edge of her towel before moving to dress. She knew she was in for another sleepless night, and had simply resigned herself to wait until the night came when she simply passed out from exhaustion. At least she would get some rest, and then maybe Rey would stop looking at her like that.

She had just wandered into her quarters, forcing the image of a familiar pair of warm, brown eyes from swimming in her mind when a quiet knock sounded from the other side of her door. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she moved to answer with a tired sigh.

"Not now, Rey, I'm just about to- "

The face that stared back at her as the door slid open stole the words from her throat, her mouth gaping open as it struggled to form new ones. Poe watched her for a moment, as if hoping she would speak first and relieve him of the feat himself.

"Hey… " he mumbled after a moment of tense silence, peering up at her through his mess of hair.

She blinked back at him, gripping the edge of the doorway with white knuckles as she swallowed the lump that had risen in his throat.

"Hey… "

He shifted uncomfortably as his eyes darted from her face to glance around the hallway.

"Look… " he began, wringing his hands together "I know it's been a weird couple of days, but I just- "

He stilled with a sigh, scrubbing his hands across his face before dragging them through his hair. He looked as tired as she felt.

"I just really missed you."

His voice was so soft she wasn't sure she had heard him correctly, the unspoked plea in his eyes confirming she had. She nodded numbly, stepping aside to allow him to cross the threshold. The familiarity of the gesture made her stomach clench. Trembling fingers keyed the door shut before curling in on themselves, nails cutting into her palms.

"Whatever Rey said to you I'm- "

" _No_ , no, it's not about that."

She shot him a look over her shoulder with a raised eyebrow, not quite brave enough to turn to him fully yet. He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck absently.

"Not saying I didn't deserve it," he conceded sheepishly.

The heavy, awkward silence that followed made her nauseous. It had never been this difficult to be alone with him.

"Look, Ny, what happened in the hangar… It wasn't… what you think."

The pang his fragmented words and unwillingness to look her in the eye sent through her chest made her just angry enough to face him, but not enough to fight the urge to tug her right sleeve down over her wrist. The gesture didn't go unnoticed, and she faltered at the unmasked guilt swimming in his eyes. She squirmed under his gaze, fixed intensely on the metal appendage, desperate to break the trance but incapable of putting the thoughts darting wildly around her head into words.

"You… you don't honestly think I could… "

His hand twitched in her direction, and soon he couldn't fight the urge to reach for her. She stood frozen as his warm fingers slid across her cool palm to entwine with hers.

"Then what?" The words came out harsher than she had intended, snapping his eyes to hers as she fought to keep from responding to his touch.

She wanted answers.

"You're supposed to be my best friend. What could you _possibly_ have to hide from me?"

He grimaced, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth as his eyes screwed shut.

"Again, not what you think."

" _Dammit Poe_ ," she hissed, yanking her hand free from his. "Just tell me the _truth_."

"The truth?!" he half shouted, the maniacal look that twisted his face startling her still. "Alright, the truth. You _do things_ to me, Nyra. You're my best friend, and when I'm around you I can't _breathe_. I can't _think_. The past three days have been _torture_. It wasn't the First Order keeping you from me, it was _me_. My complete inability to process the way you make me feel, let alone tell you. And this?" He reached forward again, taking advantage her shock-induced trance her to grasp her hand once more. "I can't even _begin_ to explain what this does to me."

A shuttering breath passed through his parted lips as his eyes clouded over, pupils blown wide.

"How it makes me think things best friends aren't supposed to think about each other."

She swallowed thickly, hypnotized by the intensity of his stare, feet moving of their own accord to step closer.

"What it does to me…physically… "

She halted, eyes trailing shamelessly down his torso. His confession sent waves of exhilaration buzzing through her, flooding her head, making her dizzy. Suddenly his face was inches from hers, free hand brushing the hair from her face.

"How it makes me wonder what it would feel like against my skin."

He raised their joined hands, manipulating his grip to press her palm to his face. His eyes slipped shut as the cool surface met his flushed skin, head tilting forward to press against her forehead.

"I'm in love with you, Ny. I don't know when it happened, but I can't hide it anymore."

Her mind reeled, desperately scrambling to process the sudden turn of events through the tears that slid down her face.

" _Please say something_ ," he whispered, face scrunching, hands clinging onto her as if he were afraid she would run from him the way he had run from her.

His words snapped her out of her daze. She brought her flesh hand up to slide up his chest to curl around his neck, thumb tracing across his jaw.

"It's about damn time, Dameron."

She didn't give him the chance to respond, lurching up onto her toes to capture his lips with hers. He responded immediately, giving himself over to the mounting desire that had built deep in his chest as he pulled her against him. Her hand slid to the back of his neck, fingers twisting in his thick, dark hair, tugging against his scalp deliciously and earning her a deep moan that was swallowed up by her mouth. The object of his desire dropped from his face to tug at the hem of his shirt, the cold kiss of her fingertips sending shockwaves of lust that coiled deep in his groin and loosening his grip already failing grip on his self control.

"You might not want to do that," he groaned against her mouth, sucking in a sharp breath as she nipped lightly at his lower lip.

"You said you wanted to know," she murmured suggestively, flattening her palm against his abdomen, the fabric of his shirt bunching on her wrist as she traced the planes of muscle that stretched across his torso.

He pulled away just enough to look at her, eyes searching her face, hot breath fanning across her neck.

"I love you, Poe," she breathed, and he jolted as her fingers slid under the waistband of his loose-fitting black pants. "But I'm done waiting."

Booted feet thudded softly against the smooth white floor of the winding corridor, BB-8 bustling along just behind. The overly-enthusiastic little droid had come spinning into the hangar with a high-pitched whistle when his master had failed to show for dinner, and Rey had nearly thrown her tools back into their box as she leapt into action when he beeped out that Poe had departed their quarters in search of Nyra.

Blood pounded in her ears as she beelined down the familiar path to her friend's room.

"Don't worry, BB-8, we'll find him," she ground out, coming to an abrupt halt as she reached her destination.

"Nyra?" she called, raising her fist to pound on her door. "Nyra, it's Rey. Look, I know Poe came to find you. Is everything okay?"

Silence.

She knocked again.

"Ny?" Voices drifted from the crack at the bottom of the door, and she strained her ears to make them out. "Is he still here? I swear if he- "

The feminine cry that sounded from the other room sent her leaping from the door as if it had burned her, a violent shade of red creeping up her neck and onto her cheeks.

"He's fine, 8, let's go"

She whirled on her heel to dart down the hallway, not taking too much stock in exactly _where_ she was going, simply determined to put space between her and the very intimate, very _private_ moment she had nearly intruded on.

"I promise," she cooed tightly to the droid that still hovered, unconvinced, by Poe's last known location. "I'm sure he appreciates the concern, but trust me when I say he'll appreciate your absence more. This is one thing I'm sure he can take care of just fine on his own."

Shaking her head against the images that flooded her mind against her will, she couldn't help the sly grin that tugged at the corners of her mouth.

"At least he better."


End file.
